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stress

By Randy Moraitis, MA, CIP, BCPC

Job stress is both a real and a growing problem. Current research shows that 30% of U.S. workers are often or always under a lot of stress at work.

People who have a high level of occupational stress have up to three times the rate of back pain–usually lower back pain. Research also shows that high job stress doubles the risk of death from heart disease and was associated with increased cholesterol and body mass index. So it’s a big problem affecting millions of people and needs a solution.

One way to help combat job stress and prevent burnout is to do some perspective shifting, so let’s give it a try.

Start by making a decision about whether you have a gas tank or you have solar panels.

Gas Tank Mindset  

Imagine a person goes to work tomorrow and has a very busy day. They start the day dealing with their first task, it’s challenging but they succeed. This burns a little fuel from their gas tank. As the day progresses they deal with multiple issues, problems and tasks, each draining more fuel from their tank.

By the end of the long, hard work day they’ve completed all of their tasks and duties, but now their gas tank is empty and they’re exhausted. So they go home to their family exhausted.

Solar Panel Mindset 

 
The second option is to imagine a person going to the same workplace. They also start the day dealing with challenging tasks and duties. And they continue to have challenging tasks throughout the day. But they have the perspective that they are blessed to have a job, and privileged to have skills and talents, that can contribute to helping others and making a difference in someone else’s life.

In that moment where they focus on the privilege of connecting with others and making a difference, the thought radiates on their solar panels and they feel charged. They carry this perspective throughout the day and by the end of the work day they may be physically tired but their soul feels charged. And that’s what they take home to their family.

So you decide. Do you have a gas tank or solar panels?

I would love to hear your thoughts or experiences with job stress. Email me at randy@randymoraitis.com. Websites: www.randymoraitis.com and www.carepossible.org.

About Randy Moraitis

Randy is married to Kim and they live in Laguna Niguel. Together they have a blended family of five adult children and three beautiful grandchildren. (If you don’t believe Randy he will gladly show you pictures!)

Randy is a Certified Intervention Professional (CIP) and expert in helping families affected by addiction and/or mental health issues. He is a Board Certified Pastoral Counselor and is both licensed and ordained as a pastoral counselor. He has five professional coaching certifications and loves working with clients on executive coaching, life coaching, wellness coaching and recovery coaching. Randy has a master’s degree with emphasis in theology and counseling, a bachelors degree in management and leadership, and a certificate in health and fitness with emphasis in exercise physiology and sports psychology from UC Irvine. He has been helping groups, individuals and families get mentally, physically and spiritually healthy in Orange County for over 25 years.

By Randy Moraitis, MA, CIP, BCPC

My job as a coach, counselor and interventionist is to help my clients live more focused and healthier lives. We can get so busy with work, relationships and responsibilities that we can easily lose focus and feel frustrated.

One tool that I teach my clients (and do myself) is the Daily Top 3 List. Done consistently, this tool can lead to increased focus, success, and happiness.

There are two parts to the Daily Top 3 List–it is actually two separate top 3 lists. One is a task list and the other is a gratitude list.

Top 3 Tasks

Let’s look at the task list first. Have you ever written out a long to-do list then get stressed out about all the things you have to do? I have. Or do you have long to-do lists where you never finished crossing off all the tasks on the list? I do.

Long to-do lists really only serve to increase our anxiety so stop using them today! Instead carefully think through what are the top 3 most important tasks for you to complete each day that will keep you moving towards your main goals and priorities in life.

Imagine it is the end of the day and you’re laying your head on your pillow. What are the top 3 tasks you would need to have accomplished to feel successful about your day so you can relax and get a good night’s sleep? These are the items that must be on your daily top 3 tasks list. Write them down then do them!

Top 3 Gratitudes

The second part of the Daily Top 3 List is a gratitude list. Research is clear that when we live with an attitude of gratitude we are less stressed, less depressed and have happier relationships. Research also shows that cardiac patients who kept gratitude journals showed improvements in their heart health.

Gratitude is good for mind, body and spirit. With all the busyness in our lives and the craziness in the world we can lose sight of living in gratitude, so we must be intentional about gratitude.

Every morning stop to write down the 3 things for which you are most grateful. It could be family, friends, health–whatever you are truly grateful for–write them down. (And unlike the daily task list, you are welcome to write down more than 3 items on your gratitude list.)

Your Next Step

There you have it–to live a healthier, happier and more focused life, take a few moments every morning to write out your top 3 tasks of the day and your top 3 gratitudes of the day.

I hope this coaching tip helps you move towards becoming the very best version of you!

I would love to hear from you. You can contact me at randy@randymoraitis.com or 949-303-8264. Check out my coaching/counseling/intervention website www.randymoraitis.com.

About Randy Moraitis

Randy is married to Kim and they live in Laguna Niguel. Together they have a blended family of five adult children and three beautiful grandchildren. (If you don’t believe Randy he will gladly show you pictures!)
Randy is a Certified Intervention Professional (CIP) and expert in helping families affected by addiction and/or mental health issues. He is a Board Certified Pastoral Counselor and is both licensed and ordained as a pastoral counselor. He has five professional coaching certifications and loves working with clients on executive coaching, life coaching, wellness coaching and recovery coaching. Randy has a master’s degree with emphasis in theology and counseling, a bachelors degree in management and leadership, and a certificate in health and fitness with emphasis in exercise physiology and sports psychology from UC Irvine. He has been helping groups, individuals and families get mentally, physically and spiritually healthy in Orange County for over 25 years.

 

marriage
1. TALK!
It is critical for couples to talk regularly and talk from the heart! As you get to know your spouse better you should grow in learning how and when to best communicate. Be wise and pay attention to what works and what doesn’t. And when you do talk, share your feelings. If you have trouble expressing your emotions, try a feelings chart by clicking here.

2. GRATITUDE!
Having an attitude of gratitude will really change the tone of your marriage. Be sincerely grateful for your spouse, and let them know that you are grateful. Sometimes we get so busy with the daily tasks of life that we take our spouses for granted. Be thankful, then tell your spouse that you are thankful!

3. TEACHABILITY!
Be open minded and mature enough to realize that you may have some new lessons to learn. We are all works in progress that will do best if open to learning and growing through life. Sometimes couple may need a therapist or counselor to teach them the tools and skills needed to grow together through a difficult issue or season.

4. INTIMACY!
There are three types of intimacy that are key to the best marriages–relational intimacy, spiritual intimacy  and sexual intimacy. When you have the first two in place, the third flows more naturally. Be sure to invest in relational intimacy through talks, activities, and date nights. Invest in spiritual intimacy by praying together and attending church together. The closeness you develop through these activities will serve to strengthen your sexual intimacy.

5. DO-OVERS!
Let’s face it, we all make mistakes! Because of this I encourage all married couples to have a rule in their marriage: if they are arguing, one spouse can say, “Let’s start over” and the other agrees.This works great for most day to day marital spats. Obviously more serious issues may require a counselor to help resolve. Bottom line–forgiveness and the willingness to start fresh is key to a healthy marriage. Holding on to resentments only hurts the marriage.

Talk to your spouse, or future spouse, about these five tips. Just having that conversation is a healthy start!

If you have any marriage tips, I’d love to hear them. You can email me at randy@randymoraitis.com. Websites: www.carepossible.org and www.randymoraitis.com.