By Randy Moraitis, MA, CIP, BCPC
The holidays are rapidly approaching and most of us have this ideal image of how we want our family lives to be full of joy and peace during this special time of year. This ideal is challenging enough in traditional family systems, but for those who are in a step-family system peace during the holidays can seem like an unattainable fantasy.
These days almost everyone is somehow connected to a step-family system whether in our own home or in the home of our relatives. You may have step-kids, step-grandchildren, step-nieces or nephews, or even get a new step-parent once you are already an adult if one of your parents remarries. If so, then you are
part of what’s called a step-family system.
Step-family systems can be very challenging. Step-families are often referred to as blended families because the hope is to blend two families together. The term “blended family” can be a little misleading as it implies that the two families blend together quickly like a smoothie in your kitchen blender.
The reality is that life in a step-family is more like using a crock-pot, than a blender. In a crock-pot it takes a long, slow time for something to cook. Step-families can take some time to get to a place of peace and harmony in the home.
Here are three quick tips to help step-families get on a healthy path during the holidays. Whether you are part of a step family system, or are someone who works with kids and families, these are great tips for you to know, share, and apply to make our families happier and healthier.
1. Have Extra Grace—The first rule of step-families is to have extra grace! That means to be more
forgiving on a daily basis. There are so many stressful issues inherent in step-families that it is imperative for step-family members to have an overall attitude of extra grace in their homes.
The parents must decide to create a culture of extra grace in their home, and then teach it to their children. And the parents must model the extra grace rule. It is very common that your step children will get under your skin faster and more frequently than your biological children. When you are aware of that tendency, it is easier to control it and exercise grace. A home filled with extra grace is a home where families can begin to blend together in a healthy way.
2. Discipline with Wisdom—In a step family system, discipline dispensed with wisdom goes a long way towards creating the best possible family environment. When step-parents discipline their step-child, this creates a great deal of resentment that may fester over time, be very difficult to overcome, and be a drain on the peace and harmony in the home.
When a child misbehaves and discipline is necessary both parents should discuss the situation and come to an agreement on the proper course of action behind closed doors. They then address the child with the biological parent stating what the discipline is, and the step-parent standing right behind the biological parent showing their support for the decision and their spouse.
Quick example: Billy, who lives with his stepdad and biological mom, stays out thirty minutes past curfew. Step-dad thinks Billy should be grounded for two weeks; mom thinks Billy should lose his cellphone
for a day. Stepdad and mom need to discuss, and perhaps compromise a little, on the course of action, but they have to do it behind closed doors or else Billy will try to divide and conquer if he sees them arguing. Once the decision is made, mom and stepdad approach Billy, with Mom in front doing the talking and
stepdad standing right behind her. Mom lays down the law and stepdad shows his strong support for her.
3. Create New Family Traditions—When two families come together each one has had family traditions in their past that are so important and dear to their hearts. While it is important to honor and respect those past traditions, it is wise to start some new family traditions that are unique to the new blended family.
New family traditions can include family movie nights, family game nights, or a new sport or other activity. And of course the holidays are a great time to start a new family tradition. Some new decorations, a special meal, attending a Christmas Eve service, a snow day, there are numerous possibilities. Be creative and have fun with it…you may be starting something that will last for generations!Happy Holidays to you and your family!
I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic. If you have any questions or comments, please send them to randy@randymoraitis.com or call 949-303-8264.
Websites: www.carepossible.org, www.randymoraitis.com.
About Randy Moraitis
Randy is married to Kim and they live in Laguna Niguel. Together they have a blended family of five adult children and three beautiful grandchildren. (If you don’t believe Randy he will gladly show you pictures!) Randy is a Certified Intervention Professional (CIP) and expert in helping families affected by addiction and/or mental health issues. He is a Board Certified Pastoral Counselor and is both licensed and ordained as a pastoral counselor. He has five professional coaching certifications and loves working with clients on executive coaching, life coaching, wellness coaching and recovery coaching. Randy has a master’s degree with emphasis in theology and counseling, a bachelors degree in management and leadership, and a certificate in health and fitness with emphasis in exercise physiology and sports psychology from UC Irvine. He has been helping groups, individuals and families get mentally, physically and spiritually healthy in Orange County for over 25 years.
How To Save A Life
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC
I received a great lesson on how to save a life earlier this week.
The lesson came in the form of a handwritten letter I found on my desk Tuesday morning.
The letter was left by someone who will remain anonymous. The letter told of how this person had been struggling with pain and addiction and depression and had lost all hope.
The letter stated that this person was seeking financial assistance and when there was none immediately available, she decided to take her life.
The letter told of the plan, the method, and the location of how and where she would end her life.
The letter shared that she was leaving our offices to go directly to end her life.
The letter stated that as she was leaving, walking out, I was walking in. She shared in the letter how I recognized her, said her name, said hello, then gave her a hug and a smile. I, of course, had absolutely no idea what was going on in her mind.
The letter shared that after the hug she continued walking towards the destination where she planned to take her life. While walking she reflected on the hug and the smile and that I remembered her name. She suddenly realized that she mattered to someone and that she mattered to God.
So she changed her mind. She chose to live.
The letter ended with the good news that she was doing much better and feeling very grateful. She wanted me to know all this so she took the time to write the letter.
Several days later she stopped by and dropped off a donation to help the homeless in our community.
So how do you save a life? With sincere love and caring for those you encounter throughout the day. You just never know what pain or trouble someone may be experiencing.
I think I’ll hold on to that letter.
Codependency
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC, CPC
Have you heard the joke, “A codependent is a person who, when they die, someone else’s life flashes before their eyes?”
That joke is really an unfortunate sign of the times and indicative of just how widespread codependency is.
So exactly what is a codependent? Melody Beattie, a leading expert and author on the subject of codependency, offers up this definition:
“A codependent person is one who has let another person’s behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person’s behavior. Codependency involves a habitual system of thinking, feeling, and behaving toward ourselves and others that causes us pain.”
Causes of Codependency
The roots of codependency can often be found in one’s family of origin. If a family is dysfunctional, a child may grow up to be codependent. Physical, sexual, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual abuse can all lead to the abused person becoming codependent.
With the proliferation of addiction to drugs and alcohol in our society, a byproduct is that we see an increase in those who struggle with codependency.
Five Core Symptoms of Codependency
1. Difficulty experiencing appropriate levels of self-esteem.
2. Difficulty setting healthy, functional boundaries.
3. Difficulty owning one’s personal reality: body, thoughts, feelings, behavior.
4. Difficulty acknowledging and meeting one’s own needs, wants, and being
interdependent.
5. Difficulty experiencing and moderately expressing reality.
Moving Toward Recovery and Away from Codependency
There is hope for the codependent! By learning to detach from the person who is the focus of codependency one can begin to be set free and start living their own life. It is important for the person struggling with codependency to learn to love themselves, find their purpose in life and learn the art of acceptance.
If you or someone you know struggles with any of the above five core symptoms, please consider taking the following steps to begin the healing process:
1. Attend a CoDa (Codependents Anonymous) support group www.coda.org.
2. See a counselor or therapist to work on pain from your past.
3. Work with a recovery coach who can help you get unstuck and have a healthy
breakthrough.
I would love to hear from you on this important topic. Contact me at randy@randymoraitis.com. Websites: www.randymoraitis.com and www.thecrossing.com.
Wellness 101
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC
Wellness is a hot topic right now. A quick Google search of the word “wellness” will net 490 million hits.
That is a huge amount of interest in the subject of wellness.
So just what is “wellness”? According to the Oxford Dictionary, wellness is “the state or condition of being in good physical and mental health”.
While fitness programs focus on physical health, wellness programs, often designed by wellness coaches, take the process a step further by including focus on one’s mental health.
This is crucial because mental health and physical health are often closely connected, as we see in the proven link between anxiety, depression, and exercise. Numerous studies have shown that regular exercise can reduce or eliminate anxiety and depression in certain individuals.
Starting on a Path to Wellness!
Physical—the American College of Sports Medicine recommends the following for physical exercise:
Mental—for good mental health try the following:
For more information on wellness programs please feel free to contact me at randy@randymoraitis.com. Websites: www.randymoraitis.com and www.thecrossing.com.
Consult with your physician or a qualified wellness coach before starting a new exercise program.
Five Step Plan for Conflict Resolution
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC
Most people hate conflict and would rather avoid conflict altogether than work towards a solution. Here is a five step plan for you to use next time you have a conflict with a friend, family member, or significant other.
1. Check Your Anger.
Be sure your anger is under control. Thomas Jefferson once said, “When angry count to ten before speaking. When very angry count to 100.” This is great advice. If you cannot share your thoughts or feelings in a safe and loving way, take some time to cool down!
2. Check The Timing.
Is this an appropriate time to deal with this conflict? Are you in public or in front of children? Find a safe and appropriate time for both parties to work towards a solution.
3. Practice Intentional Listening and Forgiveness.
Decide who will share first and who will intentionally listen first. Practice empathy and humility, and try to stay as positive as possible while sharing. Then reverse roles of listener and sharer. Thank each other for listening and ask each other how you feel about what was shared. After sharing and listening, ask for forgiveness and apologize.
4. Brainstorm Solutions.
Work together with an open mind to come up with as many solutions as possible for the conflict.
5. Choose A Solution.
Decide which solution from the brainstorming session you each are willing to try. Do your best to agree on a win-win and be open to some compromise. Clearly communicate the plan to each other. Give it a try and then give it some time. If the solution does not work out, then do another brainstorming session and choose a new solution. You can do this!
Learn this plan and you can have confidence in yourself knowing you can handle any conflict!
Special thanks to Dr. Roger Tirabassi for teaching me these techniques.
I would love to hear your input on this topic. Email: randy@randymoraitis.com.
Websites: www.randymoraitis.com and www.thecrossing.com
5 Quick Tips to Be a Great Public Speaker
I have heard said that the number one greatest human fear is public speaking, and the number two human fear is death. To paraphrase Jerry Seinfeld, this means that more people would rather be the deceased at a funeral than the person giving the eulogy.
As someone who has gone from a deathly fear of public speaking, to acceptance and even enjoyment of public speaking, I would like to share some tips I have learned along the way.
1. Practice Makes Perfect—Well probably not perfect, but my point is to follow the Boy Scout’s motto and “Be Prepared”. Practice your talk multiple times. Practice in front of a mirror or a trusted friend who will give you honest feedback. Practice with a timer so you know you will not go long.
Practice using your voice and body language to strengthen your message. Practice making eye contact with your audience. And practice smiling—if you look like you are enjoying your talk, eventually you will and so will your audience.
2. Be Yourself—Audiences today are often well informed and well educated. They can detect falseness and insincerity. So be yourself and be real. Do not shy away from admitting your weaknesses and failures. Be sure to make a personal connection with your audience at the start of your talk then be sure to speak to your audience plainly and never speak down to them.
3. Tell a Story—The power of story is an amazing thing. We usually remember stories much better than lists of dry facts. If you really want to connect with your audience and have them remember your talk, then use stories and narratives so your message is easy to follow, and much more memorable.
4. Use the Power of Three—When putting your talk together, build it in three parts:introduction, body, and conclusion. Then, during your talk, you can create a rhythm by putting examples or parallel sentences in groups of three. And include in your talk short sequences of words or phrases in threes—these are easy to remember. Couple of quick examples: stop, drop, and roll; The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly; government of the people, by the people, for the people.
5. Call to Action—Think through what next step you would like your audience to take as a result of your speech, then make the ask! During your talk create empathy between you and your listeners, and then close by making a specific ask of them to take positive action.
I would love to hear any tips you have on public speaking. You can send them to randy@randymoraitis.com.
Website: www.randymoraitis.com.
Twitter: @RMoraitis.
Who Needs Religion?
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC, CPC
While in a counseling session recently with a young couple, one of them was heard to say that they really have a problem with organized religion. That got me thinking.
Sometimes I have a problem with organized religion, too. And I am a licensed and ordained pastor. The truth is that many horrible things have been done in the name of religion throughout history. Wars, corruption, abuse—the list goes on.
And the list of evil is really enough to turn anyone away from an organization that has perpetrated such heinous acts.
On the other hand, organized religion is also responsible for numerous acts of love and kindness that have improved the human condition. Most churches have outreach ministries that give back to both the local community as well as the global community.
Each year millions are fed, clothed, given shelter and medical care from religious organizations. Those less fortunate are cared for, counseled, and even given freedom from human trafficking. These actions do not make the headlines—they are not as newsworthy, but they do happen.
So organized religion can be horrible. And organized religion can be wonderful. It is so confusing. And if organized religion can be so hard to understand, then disorganized religion could only be worse!
What is the answer? What is one to think of religion? What really is religion? Let’s take a look at how a religion defines itself.
According to the New Testament, “Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.” (James 1:27)
I suggest reading that statement multiple times to let it sink in. It seems that real religion is caring for those in society who most need help, and not living a corrupt life.
That seems quite clear. That is real religion.
And it would be wise to separate real religion from the poor choices of human beings throughout history.
Real religion is caring for others and living with integrity. If we did that, what would society be like? If leaders and politicians truly cared for others and lived with integrity, what would our world be like?
So who needs religion? I do. How about you?
Email: randy@randymoraitis.com.
Websites: www.thecrossing.com and www.randymoraitis.com.
The Low Down on Depression
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC, CPC
Depression is real. Depression is one of the greatest afflictions and killers of our time. According to the National Institute of Mental Health 18.8 million Americans have depressive disorders each year. That is nearly 10% of the adult population in our country.
Depression is real, depression is prevalent, and clinical depression is not just a sadness that one can shake off. So what’s the solution? How can someone struggling with depression get help?
According to board certified psychiatrist Todd Clements, MD, when initially treating depression there are four areas to look at–Kills, Fills, Skills, and Pills.
Kills–What are the toxins in one’s life that could contribute to depression? A diet lacking in proper nutrition. Drug or alcohol use.
Fills–What can one add to their life that is healthy? Healthy fills include exercise, proper nutrition, nurturing friendships, and support groups.
Skills–What skills does the person afflicted by depression need to acquire? These are often life skills that can be taught by a counselor such as how to set healthy boundaries in relationships, how to process anger, and how to go through grief in a healthy way.
Pills–Does one need supplements or medication? In regards to supplements, there are numerous supplements that have been shown to improve brain function. High on the list is fish oil. Multiple studies published in respected journals tout the positive benefit of fish oil for individuals struggling with depression.
Prescription medication is the most controversial treatment for depression as it often carries a stigma that many prefer to avoid. The reality is the some people have a biochemical imbalance that may require medication. Similar to if one needed insulin to stabilize blood sugar.
Untreated depression really is a matter of life and death as it can lead to suicide and other self harm. If you struggle with depression talk to your physician to ensure you get the care you need and deserve.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic. If you have any questions or comments please send them to randy@randymoraitis.com.
Website: www.randymoraitis.com.
Apology Accepted?
By Randy Moraitis, MA, BCPC
In my last blog post concepts from the book The 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman were discussed. Here we look at a later work by Dr. Chapman (along with Jennifer Thomas) called The Five Love Languages of Apology—How to Experience Healing in All Your Relationships.
The main premise in this helpful book is that individuals must learn to apologize and forgive each other in order to have healthy relationships.
There are no perfect husbands or wives, parents or kids, family members or friends. We all make mistakes. We all blow it sometimes. When we do, we need to sincerely apologize. The problem is that people have different ideas about what an apology is. What may seem like a sincere apology to one person may not be seen that way by the injured party.
The books authors claim that, through countless hours of counseling sessions, they determined there are five different ways that folks usually apologize. These languages of apology are usually learned in childhood. Here they are:
5 Languages of Apology
1. Expressing Regret—People who relate to this style of apology usually say, “I’m sorry that I.. “. Once they’ve said they are sorry, to them the situation should be over. When expressing regret, always say what you’re sorry for, and never add the word “but”.
2. Accepting Responsibility—This is when the person says, “I was wrong”. For folks who speak this language of apology once they admit they were in the wrong, they feel the matter should be over.
3. Offering to Make Restitution—Those with this language of apology will often say, “What can I do to make this right?” They want to make up for the wrong. A husband forgets his wife’s birthday perhaps he can make up for it by taking her on a cruise. To be an effective apology, the bigger the wrong, the bigger the restitution!
4. Genuinely Repenting—This is where the person in the wrong truly wants to change their behavior. They often say, “I don’t want this to keep happening”. To be sincere this apology needs a plan to show that behavior really can change.
5. Requesting Forgiveness— Some people will not forgive if you don’t ask them for
forgiveness. You just may need to say, “Will you please forgive me?”
When you apologize, what do you normally say or do? See if you can determine your apology language from the five above. Remember, the way you apologize may not be what the person you hurt needs to hear.
For example, you may hurt someone’s feelings, then say “I am sorry”, and think you have properly apologized. But that person may be waiting for you to ask for forgiveness. If you sense your apology is not
connecting it is okay to ask the other person what they need.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this or any other topic. If you have questions or comments please send them to randy@randymoraitis.com.
Website: www.randymoraitis.com. Twitter: @RMoraitis
Christmas Facts and Fallacies
By Randy Moraitis, MA, CIP, BCPC
1. What’s up with mistletoe? Mistletoe, the only plant to rival roses for inspiring kisses, was originally used by Druid priests 200 years before the birth of Christ in their winter celebrations. They revered the plant since it had no roots yet remained green during the cold months of winter.
The ancient Celtics believed mistletoe to have magical healing powers and used it as an antidote for poison, infertility, and to ward off evil spirits. The plant was also seen as a symbol of peace, and it is said that among Romans, enemies who met under mistletoe would lay down their weapons and embrace.
Scandinavians associated the plant with Frigga, their goddess of love, and it may be from this that we derive the custom of kissing under the mistletoe. Those who kissed under the mistletoe had the promise of happiness and good luck in the following year.
So mistletoe is more related to wintertime, than Christmas, but it’s use is highly encouraged by this writer.
2. The stable truth. The biblical story about the birth of Christ does not actually mention a stable. It does mention a manger which often leads people to think the baby Jesus was born in a barn. In reality, Jesus was probably born in a cave or, according to archaeology experts, Jesus was probably born in the house of relatives, but outside of the normal living and guest quarters. Quite a humble beginning.
3. Who were The Three Kings? Sorry to totally mess up your nativity scene (mine, too!) but there is no actual mention of “kings” in the biblical account of Christ’s birth. The Bible does say that wise men, also called “magi”, (but not Kings) visited Jesus. And it never says there were three of them. The word used for “magi” is plural, there were more than one, but people assume there were three because of the three gifts—gold, frankincense, and myrrh. Bottom line, they were not kings and there may not have been three of them!
4. Is Christmas really Jesus’ birthday? Although it is possible, it is very unlikely that Jesus was born on December 25th. No one knows for sure the exact date of Christ’s birth. The date chosen to celebrate it may be related to the Roman Saturnalia festival that lasted from the 17th -23rd of December. December 25th was chosen somewhere during the 4th century AD by the heads of the church. People were already used to gathering, so why not celebrate the birth of Christ?
5. Who is Santa Claus? Yes, Virginia, there really was a Santa Claus! The origin of Santa Claus began in the 4th century with the real Saint Nicholas, a Bishop in present day Turkey. By all accounts St. Nicholas was a generous and devoted Christ follower. He was particularly devoted to children. His kindness and reputation for generosity gave rise to much folklore that has spread and increased across cultures and through the years.
6. What about Jesus? Who was he? Did he really exist or was he a mythological character? There can be no doubt that Jesus actually existed and that he walked the earth. Sources outside of the Bible clearly confirm this. We may not have all the facts and cast of characters of our nativity scenes completely accurate, but we can rest assured that Jesus Christ was born, that his birth has been celebrated for two thousand years, and that he is the reason for the season. Merry Christmas!
Do you have any interesting Christmas facts or fallacies? I would love to hear them! Contact me at randy@randymoraitis.com or 949-303-8264. Websites: www.randymoraitis.com and www.carepossible.org.
About Randy Moraitis
Randy is married to Kim and they live in Laguna Niguel. Together they have a blended family of five adult children and three beautiful grandchildren. (If you don’t believe Randy he will gladly show you pictures!) Randy is a Certified Intervention Professional (CIP) and expert in helping families affected by addiction and/or mental health issues. He is a Board Certified Pastoral Counselor and is both licensed and ordained as a pastoral counselor. He has five professional coaching certifications and loves working with clients on executive coaching, life coaching, wellness coaching and recovery coaching. Randy has a master’s degree with emphasis in theology and counseling, a bachelors degree in management and leadership, and a certificate in health and fitness with emphasis in exercise physiology and sports psychology from UC Irvine. He has been helping groups, individuals and families get mentally, physically and spiritually healthy in Orange County for over 25 years.
3 Quick Tips for Step-families During the Holidays
By Randy Moraitis, MA, CIP, BCPC
The holidays are rapidly approaching and most of us have this ideal image of how we want our family lives to be full of joy and peace during this special time of year. This ideal is challenging enough in traditional family systems, but for those who are in a step-family system peace during the holidays can seem like an unattainable fantasy.
These days almost everyone is somehow connected to a step-family system whether in our own home or in the home of our relatives. You may have step-kids, step-grandchildren, step-nieces or nephews, or even get a new step-parent once you are already an adult if one of your parents remarries. If so, then you are
part of what’s called a step-family system.
Step-family systems can be very challenging. Step-families are often referred to as blended families because the hope is to blend two families together. The term “blended family” can be a little misleading as it implies that the two families blend together quickly like a smoothie in your kitchen blender.
The reality is that life in a step-family is more like using a crock-pot, than a blender. In a crock-pot it takes a long, slow time for something to cook. Step-families can take some time to get to a place of peace and harmony in the home.
Here are three quick tips to help step-families get on a healthy path during the holidays. Whether you are part of a step family system, or are someone who works with kids and families, these are great tips for you to know, share, and apply to make our families happier and healthier.
1. Have Extra Grace—The first rule of step-families is to have extra grace! That means to be more
forgiving on a daily basis. There are so many stressful issues inherent in step-families that it is imperative for step-family members to have an overall attitude of extra grace in their homes.
The parents must decide to create a culture of extra grace in their home, and then teach it to their children. And the parents must model the extra grace rule. It is very common that your step children will get under your skin faster and more frequently than your biological children. When you are aware of that tendency, it is easier to control it and exercise grace. A home filled with extra grace is a home where families can begin to blend together in a healthy way.
2. Discipline with Wisdom—In a step family system, discipline dispensed with wisdom goes a long way towards creating the best possible family environment. When step-parents discipline their step-child, this creates a great deal of resentment that may fester over time, be very difficult to overcome, and be a drain on the peace and harmony in the home.
When a child misbehaves and discipline is necessary both parents should discuss the situation and come to an agreement on the proper course of action behind closed doors. They then address the child with the biological parent stating what the discipline is, and the step-parent standing right behind the biological parent showing their support for the decision and their spouse.
Quick example: Billy, who lives with his stepdad and biological mom, stays out thirty minutes past curfew. Step-dad thinks Billy should be grounded for two weeks; mom thinks Billy should lose his cellphone
for a day. Stepdad and mom need to discuss, and perhaps compromise a little, on the course of action, but they have to do it behind closed doors or else Billy will try to divide and conquer if he sees them arguing. Once the decision is made, mom and stepdad approach Billy, with Mom in front doing the talking and
stepdad standing right behind her. Mom lays down the law and stepdad shows his strong support for her.
3. Create New Family Traditions—When two families come together each one has had family traditions in their past that are so important and dear to their hearts. While it is important to honor and respect those past traditions, it is wise to start some new family traditions that are unique to the new blended family.
New family traditions can include family movie nights, family game nights, or a new sport or other activity. And of course the holidays are a great time to start a new family tradition. Some new decorations, a special meal, attending a Christmas Eve service, a snow day, there are numerous possibilities. Be creative and have fun with it…you may be starting something that will last for generations!Happy Holidays to you and your family!
I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic. If you have any questions or comments, please send them to randy@randymoraitis.com or call 949-303-8264.
Websites: www.carepossible.org, www.randymoraitis.com.
About Randy Moraitis
Randy is married to Kim and they live in Laguna Niguel. Together they have a blended family of five adult children and three beautiful grandchildren. (If you don’t believe Randy he will gladly show you pictures!) Randy is a Certified Intervention Professional (CIP) and expert in helping families affected by addiction and/or mental health issues. He is a Board Certified Pastoral Counselor and is both licensed and ordained as a pastoral counselor. He has five professional coaching certifications and loves working with clients on executive coaching, life coaching, wellness coaching and recovery coaching. Randy has a master’s degree with emphasis in theology and counseling, a bachelors degree in management and leadership, and a certificate in health and fitness with emphasis in exercise physiology and sports psychology from UC Irvine. He has been helping groups, individuals and families get mentally, physically and spiritually healthy in Orange County for over 25 years.